I could try to write reasons why I haven’t posted here in a while.
I could also pretend I have an audience.
In fact, over the past six months of near blog dormancy, I have had quite the audience – at least if the comment moderation queue is any indication. These dear readers have been very helpful. Many offer free drugs. Some provide sex advice. But perhaps the most valuable comments come in the form of a free joke (followed, of course, by a link to ch3ap v1agr@!!!11).
Over the next few weeks, as holiday schedules hopefully provide a slow down to day job related chaos, I’ll be posting some work and other notes. I’ll cover Digital Out-of-home, Arduino, some photography work, and some other topics. I may even add a captcha to my comments form.
For now, however, here is as complete a list I can compile of the jokes left in my comments over the past few months…after the break.
Why can’t a woman ask her brother for help? Because he can’t be a brother and assist her too.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.
Why do Vampire have to brush their teeth? Because they have Bat-Breath.
When should you use milk to irrigate your fields? When you are growing creamed corn.
What kind of flowers grow in outer space? Sunflowers.
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick.
What do you call a crazy baker? A dough nut.
What do ghouls wear on their feet in the rain?!? GHOULOSHES!!!
What kind of lettuce was served on the Titanic? Iceberg.
Why are there so many Johnsons in the phone book? They all have phones.
Why did the bunnies go on strike? They wanted a raise in celery.
What’s a chimney sweep’s most common ailment? The flue.
What do you get when you cross a squirrel with a kangaroo? An animal that keeps its nuts in its pockets.
Where does all the pepper go? No one nose.
Why did the cannibal rush over to the cafeteria? He heard children were half price.
What is a cannibal’s favorite type of TV show? A celebrity roast.
How do they put out fires at the post office? They stamp them out.
How many Microsoft employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. We’ll just declare darkness the new standard.
What do you call it when instead of raining cats and dogs, it rains chickens, ducks and turkeys? Fowl Weather!
What kind of necktie does a pig wear? A pigsty.
Why is an evil witch like a candle? They are both WICKED
What kind of bird can write? A penguin.
Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing? He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.
What do you call bedtime stories for boats? Ferry tales.
What did the painter say to the wall? One more crack and I’ll plaster you!
What do you call a bunch of dancing pebbles? The Rockettes.
What do you call a knife that cuts 4 loaves of bread at a time? A four-loaf cleaver.
A Return to Blogging (with free jokes!)
I could try to write reasons why I haven’t posted here in a while.
I could also pretend I have an audience.
In fact, over the past six months of near blog dormancy, I have had quite the audience – at least if the comment moderation queue is any indication. These dear readers have been very helpful. Many offer free drugs. Some provide sex advice. But perhaps the most valuable comments come in the form of a free joke (followed, of course, by a link to ch3ap v1agr@!!!11).
Over the next few weeks, as holiday schedules hopefully provide a slow down to day job related chaos, I’ll be posting some work and other notes. I’ll cover Digital Out-of-home, Arduino, some photography work, and some other topics. I may even add a captcha to my comments form.
For now, however, here is as complete a list I can compile of the jokes left in my comments over the past few months…after the break.